Dóchas; Living a Life of Hope with MS: Moaning Michael

For all the positivity I preach, this week I have been such a moaning Michael.

I am SO tired all the time, which is completely ruining the chance of anything productive coming from me.
My mood and motivation are so low, and I just can't get my shit together. My pjs have become my favourite "outfit" and the couch is my safe place. I have tried to increase my motivation through setting little tasks and goals throughout the day, but it's not working :(

I do feel like I am suffering with what a lot of MSers call "Brain Fog". I'm struggling with remembering things, and sometimes during sentences, words just "fall" out of my head. It can be quite frustrating, and scary too, if I am truly honest.

This is the first time in a while I've felt like this, emotionally, but I'm allowing it to happen. I'm the only person who puts me under any pressure to do things; clean the house, cook dinner, run errands, etc. I've finally allowed myself to take time out when my body or brain tells me to. A few months ago, my body had symptoms which forced me to rest, now it's my brain. So I'm going with the flow.... but no doubt I'll be back to my shiny, happy self in no time!

What is Multiple Sclerosis?

MS is an auto- immune disease that affects the brain and spinal cord. It affects more women than men, and is usually diagnosed between the ages of 20- 40. MS is caused by damage to the myeline sheath, the protective covering that surrounds the nerve cells. When this covering is damaged, nerve impulses are slowed down, or stopped. The damage is caused by an inflammation, which occurs when the body's own immune cells attack the nervous system. The causes for MS are currently unknown, but genetic and environmental factors may be involved.

5 comments:

JudyApril 14, 2011 at 9:08 AM
One of the greatest lessons I have learned from this illness is to exercise compassion, not just toward others but also toward myself.

Judy
LydiaApril 16, 2011 at 9:20 AM
Absolutely, Judy. One of my favourite sayings is "Every day is a school day". I would have always felt very self aware, but I am learning so much about myself through this journey. I am learning how to improve my weaknesses (relinquishing control and asking for help being the biggest!)and also how it is okay to say "no, I cannot do that" or "I'm tired". I don't like to be seen as weak but I have gradually understood that this does not show a character flaw, it is what I need to do to stay healthy.
Sarah MartinApril 24, 2011 at 8:41 AM
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sarah MartinApril 24, 2011 at 8:43 AM
Hello Lydia

I use an old acting technique used when they can't remember their lines. The "ummm" with thoughtful expression has been working for me too. Dramatic hand gestures also distract listeners for valuable memory accessing time. And, if you can't remember something, ask yourself if it was really worth your attention in the first place.

You're ill and it's time to cut yourself some slack. This is MS and you can make it work. XXX
Deana TankersleyJuly 15, 2011 at 8:22 AM
ok uuum me too 8D anywho yea i'm real new as of this week..but the brainfog..man it can really be embarrassing you know..i noticed it about two wks aga=o and felt like an idiot..=( anyway its so good to talk to others who understand..great 2 meet other msers 8D